Drunkenhood and Humblepie: A Broke, Poor Man’s Cookbook (Recipe #4: Dickensian Pudding)

Recipe #4: Dickensian Pudding

1. The rest of that wheat bread that was in the freezer.
2. A good-size tab of margarine.
3. Cold water (about 3/4 the volume of the bread).
4. Two bouillon cubes: one chicken, one beef.
5. Pinches of cinnamon, sea salt, black pepper, crushed red pepper, parsley.
6. Tablespoon peanut butter.
7. Tablespoon granulated brown sugar.

Put everything into a sauce pan on high. Bring to a boil, then put on medium heat, stirring a lot. Play Words with Friends. Simmer until pudding-like texture.

The Verdict:

Inedible.

Ok, so I tried to boil off the water, but it just wasn’t happening, and I started to burn it. So I threw in a handful of dry oatmeal to soak that shit up… stirring it around now… it seems to have done the trick and is thickening finally. Might as well throw in a few raisins… I took it off the heat and covered it for a while

The Real Verdict:

What I have in front of me is a gelatinous mound of steaming brown gruel that looks suitable for a horse and not much else.

It’s cooling of now, and actually is starting to look like real pudding.

I never had great expectations, and this lives up to it: A bit too salty, mushy and charcoaly, but in a way, not so bad.

Post-Mortem: 

I ate the whole bowl! Once I got used to the flavors, it was actually pretty great! Now I feel sleepy and a touch high, which might be from a minor salt-imbalance, or maybe the cinnamon. In other news: I just read that you can get high off nutmeg. Who knew?

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